Miss Understood....

"Buckle up: It's going to be one hell of a bumpy ride. The stars aren't speaking metaphorically here. Wear your seatbelt all week. "

.... Odd how some things simply make a Kitty purrrr. The smell of gasoline, power tools, heavy equipment.... I tend to be taken at face value - some naively approachable bottle blonde with a conservatively (bordering on religious insanity) dainty quirkiness about her. Often met with looks of pure disbelief as I fancifully browse the aisles of the local home improvement store. Downright strutting (and drooling) as the smell of sawdust dances on my senses and I seek out the toys with double-digit horsepower.

Today, I had the ultimate pleasure of hopping behind the wheel of an F550 Dump/Plow due to the necessity of transporting it from one junkyard to the ever growing one I'm responsible for at work. Despite my utter distaste for dealing with the general public in broad daylight, I must admit there was something swimmingly masculine and fun about this little outing. Almost taking out those pesky little sedans who never would have known what hit them (until I backed up over them for the third or fourth time). An ever-growing ego behind the wheel of this powerful beast with all the fancy buttons and hydraulic features. I daydreamed of passersby - catching one glimpse of the platinum broad, dressed in high heels and a work-appropriate skirt....smoking a menthol cigarette.... a wild look in her eye - mumbling: "Now that's ONE TOUGH BITCH!".

In reality, I'm sure no one gave a second thought to yet another crappy driver on the streets of this "fair" city. Add one to the list of clearly illiterate and/or disobedient truck drivers with wanton disregard for the sign that clearly warned against making a left onto that side street when over 10,000 GVWR. No matter... back in my head, I was the supreme Queen of the Road - The greatest thing since sliced bread who could strike fear in the hearts of men with so little as a cutesy wink.

It's no doubt a good thing I don't leave my cage often - and further a sheer blessing that I've never procured a firearm.... In my silly attempts to dazzle those I feel underestimate me, I frequently find I have, in fact, made a complete ass of myself.

Oh well. Twas a delicious stress reliever nonetheless. All was not lost as Annie got to drive a truck today. And Annie can recall the excursion however she damn well pleases :)

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Kitty

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Miss Understood....

"Buckle up: It's going to be one hell of a bumpy ride. The stars aren't speaking metaphorically here. Wear your seatbelt all week. "

.... Odd how some things simply make a Kitty purrrr. The smell of gasoline, power tools, heavy equipment.... I tend to be taken at face value - some naively approachable bottle blonde with a conservatively (bordering on religious insanity) dainty quirkiness about her. Often met with looks of pure disbelief as I fancifully browse the aisles of the local home improvement store. Downright strutting (and drooling) as the smell of sawdust dances on my senses and I seek out the toys with double-digit horsepower.

Today, I had the ultimate pleasure of hopping behind the wheel of an F550 Dump/Plow due to the necessity of transporting it from one junkyard to the ever growing one I'm responsible for at work. Despite my utter distaste for dealing with the general public in broad daylight, I must admit there was something swimmingly masculine and fun about this little outing. Almost taking out those pesky little sedans who never would have known what hit them (until I backed up over them for the third or fourth time). An ever-growing ego behind the wheel of this powerful beast with all the fancy buttons and hydraulic features. I daydreamed of passersby - catching one glimpse of the platinum broad, dressed in high heels and a work-appropriate skirt....smoking a menthol cigarette.... a wild look in her eye - mumbling: "Now that's ONE TOUGH BITCH!".

In reality, I'm sure no one gave a second thought to yet another crappy driver on the streets of this "fair" city. Add one to the list of clearly illiterate and/or disobedient truck drivers with wanton disregard for the sign that clearly warned against making a left onto that side street when over 10,000 GVWR. No matter... back in my head, I was the supreme Queen of the Road - The greatest thing since sliced bread who could strike fear in the hearts of men with so little as a cutesy wink.

It's no doubt a good thing I don't leave my cage often - and further a sheer blessing that I've never procured a firearm.... In my silly attempts to dazzle those I feel underestimate me, I frequently find I have, in fact, made a complete ass of myself.

Oh well. Twas a delicious stress reliever nonetheless. All was not lost as Annie got to drive a truck today. And Annie can recall the excursion however she damn well pleases :)

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