From Out Of The Woodwork....

"You are shocked and embarrassed when police tell you that "Manwiches" should be made from a canned-beef mix."

I was quite pleasantly surprised this past weekend to not only learn we HAD neighbors, but that these same neighbors were additionally friendly drinkin' folk! Despite my tendencies to remain blissfully locked within the sanctity of my shade-drawn habitat, I was inspired to do the unthinkable: Open the garage during a time I wasn't heading directly to or from the car. I just opened it. I sat in my garage and left it open. Much to my amazement, people began gathering. Seemingly from out of nowhere! Aside from our friend two doors down, I didn't recognize a single face. We have been in this house approaching 5 years now. Yeah.



It seems there was this bustling little community just beyond our front door. Come to find out, many of them had moved in shortly before or after we did. I further discovered many of them had children of the same ages as my midgets! Who the hell knew? Oh right - people who don't dart out to retrieve the mail in a panic during the middle of the night...

I'm unable to pinpoint when I became so entirely withdrawn - if memory serves me, which it certainly RARELY DOES - I could even recall one or two times I was weeding or accomplishing another such project where I would have been out of my comfort zone and in direct view of these creatures. Then again, given the caliber of some of our visitors, I can't blame them in the least for keeping a respectable distance. We must have appeared to be some strange concoction of The Radley household and The Klopeks! Those who know me would possibly respond with showers of praise... Mission accomplished, no?



Well, not necessarily. I had an admittedly lonely childhood as my parents had achieved a level of fear from all our curiously god-fearing neighbors. I had neglected to make a conscious decision in ensuring my own boys were equally ostracized. I was always under the impression I wasn't making a completely terrible impression - after all, I was careful not to utilize my broom for my daily commute, and I even recently began incorporating color into my strange wardrobe! If that's not a worthy attempt at social contact, I'm unsure what IS!



Perhaps I could blame My Big Bag Of Man Candy? To the untrained eye, he can appear a fearful sort of gent.... While on one of our dates early on, I was quietly pulled aside by the management of a certain establishment to see if I needed "assistance" - It seems the perception was that this biker-looking "brute" had kidnapped Yours Truly. I still have a hearty chuckle at that memory! No, that couldn't be the cause... beyond the foreboding exterior, he is a doll with a heart of gold. I mentioned the friend two houses down - he and my 'Ol Man were thick as thieves within minutes of meeting!

Lacking anyone else to pin the blame to akin to a badge of honor, it looks like this was all my own design. And yet, as this plan unraveled before my eyes, I was filled with a sense of.... how you say?.... Ah yes, "community"! This all resulted in delightful, if not slightly hazy and alcohol-filled, memories. One could say I was downright dazzled at this group's ability to hang. The nights went on til well past the witching hour and by 6am the next day, we'd all be at it again. With no pressing errands or other tasks, it was simply delectable basking in the warmth of late Spring and Jack Daniels. For once in recent history, all the sounds of joy and sarcastic banter were resonating around me as opposed to out a distant window. It was a taste of what is apparently to come and I was able to raise my glass to that with minimal effort.



I will refrain from addressing my current mental capabilities :) Cheers!

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Kitty

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

From Out Of The Woodwork....

"You are shocked and embarrassed when police tell you that "Manwiches" should be made from a canned-beef mix."

I was quite pleasantly surprised this past weekend to not only learn we HAD neighbors, but that these same neighbors were additionally friendly drinkin' folk! Despite my tendencies to remain blissfully locked within the sanctity of my shade-drawn habitat, I was inspired to do the unthinkable: Open the garage during a time I wasn't heading directly to or from the car. I just opened it. I sat in my garage and left it open. Much to my amazement, people began gathering. Seemingly from out of nowhere! Aside from our friend two doors down, I didn't recognize a single face. We have been in this house approaching 5 years now. Yeah.



It seems there was this bustling little community just beyond our front door. Come to find out, many of them had moved in shortly before or after we did. I further discovered many of them had children of the same ages as my midgets! Who the hell knew? Oh right - people who don't dart out to retrieve the mail in a panic during the middle of the night...

I'm unable to pinpoint when I became so entirely withdrawn - if memory serves me, which it certainly RARELY DOES - I could even recall one or two times I was weeding or accomplishing another such project where I would have been out of my comfort zone and in direct view of these creatures. Then again, given the caliber of some of our visitors, I can't blame them in the least for keeping a respectable distance. We must have appeared to be some strange concoction of The Radley household and The Klopeks! Those who know me would possibly respond with showers of praise... Mission accomplished, no?



Well, not necessarily. I had an admittedly lonely childhood as my parents had achieved a level of fear from all our curiously god-fearing neighbors. I had neglected to make a conscious decision in ensuring my own boys were equally ostracized. I was always under the impression I wasn't making a completely terrible impression - after all, I was careful not to utilize my broom for my daily commute, and I even recently began incorporating color into my strange wardrobe! If that's not a worthy attempt at social contact, I'm unsure what IS!



Perhaps I could blame My Big Bag Of Man Candy? To the untrained eye, he can appear a fearful sort of gent.... While on one of our dates early on, I was quietly pulled aside by the management of a certain establishment to see if I needed "assistance" - It seems the perception was that this biker-looking "brute" had kidnapped Yours Truly. I still have a hearty chuckle at that memory! No, that couldn't be the cause... beyond the foreboding exterior, he is a doll with a heart of gold. I mentioned the friend two houses down - he and my 'Ol Man were thick as thieves within minutes of meeting!

Lacking anyone else to pin the blame to akin to a badge of honor, it looks like this was all my own design. And yet, as this plan unraveled before my eyes, I was filled with a sense of.... how you say?.... Ah yes, "community"! This all resulted in delightful, if not slightly hazy and alcohol-filled, memories. One could say I was downright dazzled at this group's ability to hang. The nights went on til well past the witching hour and by 6am the next day, we'd all be at it again. With no pressing errands or other tasks, it was simply delectable basking in the warmth of late Spring and Jack Daniels. For once in recent history, all the sounds of joy and sarcastic banter were resonating around me as opposed to out a distant window. It was a taste of what is apparently to come and I was able to raise my glass to that with minimal effort.



I will refrain from addressing my current mental capabilities :) Cheers!

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Post a Comment