Snap Your Fingers Snap Your Neck

"There will be trouble in your Fire sign this week, especially if you pull down on that lever just below the sign when there's no fire. That’s a major felony."


Easy, Tiger, the title is a song, not an outright threat. That said, things are about to get heated in here. I thought about making this post an open letter to someone who has simply gone too far... I still might. Round and round she goes - where she stops? Nobody knows! 


I've previously given props to a few shining individuals in my life for whom the phrase "The road to hell is paved with good intentions" was coined. Today I step up on that podium and accept the award myself. Though never claiming to have all the answers, I can't seem to stop myself from still trying to make some up. In this case, I was so far out of my element, it wasn't even the same damn sport. I am not trained to deal with the mentally ill, so I'm fairly certain I'm not qualified to use the same rationale I would in what seems outwardly like a similar scenario. My advice blew up into a bat-shit temper tantrum borne from the bowels of hell last night  (And no, I wasn't the one throwing said tantrum) and now I have a baker's dozen worth of fires to put out as opposed to the initial 4 or 5. 


All the disclaimers aside, how does one go about explaining to a 5-year old and a 2-year old that the one person they trusted almost as much as their parents just tried to run them over in the driveway? How does a Mama look into the tear-soaked eyes of those innocent creatures and explain it's not their fault? That they shouldn't be afraid, but that we all must now be extremely cautious? That they should run and tell a teacher if this relative shows up at their school? That we're now leaving out the front door until Papa can change the code on the garage? This Mama kept a poker face... or perhaps a clown face *shivers*, as I tried to make it all more of a whimsical game...No... a sport - but in this case, the competition SHOULD be fierce, and second place simply isn't an option where their safety is concerned... This human Mama has transformed, quite instantaneously, into a Mama BEAR. Simply put: Don't fuck with my cubs. 


You will lose.


It's not all sunshine and rage going on over here. There is a bloody cornucopia of emotions swirling about in my already weary skull. I must address certain issues and take specific precautions - yet there may come a time when a second chance comes into play. No time soon, mind you - but nothing is forever. With each successive decision made, there must be delicate thought placed on its eventual undoing. That's a tough spot to find oneself in - especially when the wound is so very fresh. 


Yet, through it all, the words of those far wiser than myself play on a loop in my thoughts:
There are always at least two sides to every story. 
Factors to those sides. 
Further influence on those factors. 
A grander scheme beyond it all. 
This too, shall pass. 


In the meantime, I think my children are due more snuggles and reassurances of safety. Of security. If only every child could know those things. If not for the motivation of necessity, my heart would be quite shattered. Onward and upward, right? Right.







6 comments:

  1. How terrifying. My child's safety is THE most important thing in my life, so I can only imagine how horrific this situation is for you.
    Alerting the school that this person is in no way allowed to go near your child may be protective, as well.
    I hope the situation improves and the person gets some help and starts on their road to recovery.
    *hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you so much, Doll. It is truly my own personal hell to feel out of control in a situation such as this (heartache). My boys can both be so terribly sensitive and they think this is somehow their fault (more heartache). I alerted EVERY CONTACT at both schools and have been watching my cell phone like a hawk for unwelcome news (none yet *phew*)...Unfortunately, the person has repeated this cycle most of her life (only with slight changes in scenery). I sincerely hope she seeks the help she so clearly needs as well. Thank you, again, for your kindness! THIS is precisely why I blog :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh my goodness!

    Like you, I too am fiercely protective of my children. I'm a mama lion and my claws protract if you even look at them with cross eyes.

    As far as explaining to your kidlets what happened and more importantly why. I would just try to tell them that some people have boo-boos in their brains that can sometimes make them do unsafe things and they (your boys) are NOT to blame and that YOU (their mama bear) will keep them safe.


    I hope that you and your family are safe and I’m sending positive thoughts your way. There is nothing I want more than for you to feel secure and know that you are doing the right thing for your boys.


    ((Hugs))

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, Pamela, thank you so much for your wonderful suggestions and kindness! I actually started crying when I read your comment, it was so thoughtful and sweet! We will be OK, and those little guys - sensitive & fragile as they can be - often dazzle me with their resilience. We try protecting them from the world and tend to only later realize they were more aware than we gave them credit for in the first place. So much love to you and your family, Honey! ((hugs))

    ReplyDelete
  5. jeeeezuz, life can be so hard sometimes. I don't have kids but i FREAK if I think my dog is in the slightest bit of danger. Sometimes I think I love him that I love myself (speaking of the mentally ill.) I hope you find a way for you and your kids to feel and be safe! I don't know if this would be appropriate or not but have you considered filing charges or getting a restraining order? May not be good ideas, you know better than I would.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Right? And shit, I find absolutely nothing odd or insane about loving animals more than people! What's not to love? You know, we had thought about all the possibilities including restraining orders, charges and suggesting hospitalization or institutional assistance. Frankly, they're still totally on the table. We'll have to find some balance. No one had heard from her since this went down so we made that call last night. It was brief, but civil. That extra "special" ingredient in the sauce is coping with theatrics and attention-getting schemes and balancing those out with true lapses in judgement or moments of hysterics. Right now, all the "crazy" is aimed solely at us but I'm confident we will make those tough decisions to protect the kiddos and give them security. Thank you so much for all your thoughtfulness! Much Love, My Friend.

    ReplyDelete

Kitty

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Snap Your Fingers Snap Your Neck

"There will be trouble in your Fire sign this week, especially if you pull down on that lever just below the sign when there's no fire. That’s a major felony."


Easy, Tiger, the title is a song, not an outright threat. That said, things are about to get heated in here. I thought about making this post an open letter to someone who has simply gone too far... I still might. Round and round she goes - where she stops? Nobody knows! 


I've previously given props to a few shining individuals in my life for whom the phrase "The road to hell is paved with good intentions" was coined. Today I step up on that podium and accept the award myself. Though never claiming to have all the answers, I can't seem to stop myself from still trying to make some up. In this case, I was so far out of my element, it wasn't even the same damn sport. I am not trained to deal with the mentally ill, so I'm fairly certain I'm not qualified to use the same rationale I would in what seems outwardly like a similar scenario. My advice blew up into a bat-shit temper tantrum borne from the bowels of hell last night  (And no, I wasn't the one throwing said tantrum) and now I have a baker's dozen worth of fires to put out as opposed to the initial 4 or 5. 


All the disclaimers aside, how does one go about explaining to a 5-year old and a 2-year old that the one person they trusted almost as much as their parents just tried to run them over in the driveway? How does a Mama look into the tear-soaked eyes of those innocent creatures and explain it's not their fault? That they shouldn't be afraid, but that we all must now be extremely cautious? That they should run and tell a teacher if this relative shows up at their school? That we're now leaving out the front door until Papa can change the code on the garage? This Mama kept a poker face... or perhaps a clown face *shivers*, as I tried to make it all more of a whimsical game...No... a sport - but in this case, the competition SHOULD be fierce, and second place simply isn't an option where their safety is concerned... This human Mama has transformed, quite instantaneously, into a Mama BEAR. Simply put: Don't fuck with my cubs. 


You will lose.


It's not all sunshine and rage going on over here. There is a bloody cornucopia of emotions swirling about in my already weary skull. I must address certain issues and take specific precautions - yet there may come a time when a second chance comes into play. No time soon, mind you - but nothing is forever. With each successive decision made, there must be delicate thought placed on its eventual undoing. That's a tough spot to find oneself in - especially when the wound is so very fresh. 


Yet, through it all, the words of those far wiser than myself play on a loop in my thoughts:
There are always at least two sides to every story. 
Factors to those sides. 
Further influence on those factors. 
A grander scheme beyond it all. 
This too, shall pass. 


In the meantime, I think my children are due more snuggles and reassurances of safety. Of security. If only every child could know those things. If not for the motivation of necessity, my heart would be quite shattered. Onward and upward, right? Right.







6 comments:

  1. How terrifying. My child's safety is THE most important thing in my life, so I can only imagine how horrific this situation is for you.
    Alerting the school that this person is in no way allowed to go near your child may be protective, as well.
    I hope the situation improves and the person gets some help and starts on their road to recovery.
    *hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you so much, Doll. It is truly my own personal hell to feel out of control in a situation such as this (heartache). My boys can both be so terribly sensitive and they think this is somehow their fault (more heartache). I alerted EVERY CONTACT at both schools and have been watching my cell phone like a hawk for unwelcome news (none yet *phew*)...Unfortunately, the person has repeated this cycle most of her life (only with slight changes in scenery). I sincerely hope she seeks the help she so clearly needs as well. Thank you, again, for your kindness! THIS is precisely why I blog :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh my goodness!

    Like you, I too am fiercely protective of my children. I'm a mama lion and my claws protract if you even look at them with cross eyes.

    As far as explaining to your kidlets what happened and more importantly why. I would just try to tell them that some people have boo-boos in their brains that can sometimes make them do unsafe things and they (your boys) are NOT to blame and that YOU (their mama bear) will keep them safe.


    I hope that you and your family are safe and I’m sending positive thoughts your way. There is nothing I want more than for you to feel secure and know that you are doing the right thing for your boys.


    ((Hugs))

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, Pamela, thank you so much for your wonderful suggestions and kindness! I actually started crying when I read your comment, it was so thoughtful and sweet! We will be OK, and those little guys - sensitive & fragile as they can be - often dazzle me with their resilience. We try protecting them from the world and tend to only later realize they were more aware than we gave them credit for in the first place. So much love to you and your family, Honey! ((hugs))

    ReplyDelete
  5. jeeeezuz, life can be so hard sometimes. I don't have kids but i FREAK if I think my dog is in the slightest bit of danger. Sometimes I think I love him that I love myself (speaking of the mentally ill.) I hope you find a way for you and your kids to feel and be safe! I don't know if this would be appropriate or not but have you considered filing charges or getting a restraining order? May not be good ideas, you know better than I would.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Right? And shit, I find absolutely nothing odd or insane about loving animals more than people! What's not to love? You know, we had thought about all the possibilities including restraining orders, charges and suggesting hospitalization or institutional assistance. Frankly, they're still totally on the table. We'll have to find some balance. No one had heard from her since this went down so we made that call last night. It was brief, but civil. That extra "special" ingredient in the sauce is coping with theatrics and attention-getting schemes and balancing those out with true lapses in judgement or moments of hysterics. Right now, all the "crazy" is aimed solely at us but I'm confident we will make those tough decisions to protect the kiddos and give them security. Thank you so much for all your thoughtfulness! Much Love, My Friend.

    ReplyDelete